These are the stars and these are the seas Well, these are some places that we're lucky just to be between
excerpt from working title "crusade" undated 2018
Que te mire como la primera vez, que te bese como la primera vez, que te ame como la primera vez, que te diga sus sueños, sus metas, que te diga todo con sus ojitos, pero sobre todo que siga siendo el mismo de la primera vez, eso no tiene precio.
i miss you sharing songs with me
i miss hearing you play the guitar
i miss hearing you sing
i can’t tell you how much i miss you
you are always on my mind
i have so much to share
but you are so far away
i just have to hold on
till i guess when i am supposed to
then i will be with you
we can then share everything again
I don't see what you get by lying. You are not going to gain anything by lying. If you are looking for pity, you are not going to get it, definitely not from me.
My heart, all night it keeps sighing
Your memories make it restless
There is a sweet intoxication, everything seems blur
My heart does not understand a thing
It belonged to me, but now it’s a stranger
For you dwell in me, in my heart, a part of my life
Just like raindrops during monsoon
Like a story that conveys from my heart
My heart has always been in loved with you
When it feels you, it just starts to run, just like how I do
It’s obsessed with you, for you are it’s peace
You are the only one for my heart
Just don’t understand
For at times it is silent, at times it sings aloud
It sings your praises all the time
Are you real or are you just an illusion
You should know my heart is crazy about you
And it will always be
For it does not listen to me
Made these from some late night brain spillages into my notes app for a school project :)
So I’m on Facebook right now.
And I’m looking at people I grew up with,
People in general who I’ve grown up with.
I feel a mixture of emotions.
I don’t want to live a normal life,
A localized life,
But in choosing this other path,
I’ve lost some commonalities,
And it’s ok,
There’s also this, but a lot of those people
Not trying to be disrespectful, but my god
Are they ugly, and they can’t dress,
Somehow someway at 29 years old
I am not ugly, and I do know how to dress,
I’ve kept something original about myself
I’ve developed myself,
And it’s starting to hit me, how much I have
Developed and created separation from myself,
It’s like when Elly told me she didn’t know how to be normal,
She still doesn’t, and loving her is quite difficult,
But I am not normal either, I don’t know how to be normal,
Right now, I’m talking to a normal woman
Who’s a medical professional, and I just don’t know how to be mundane, I don’t know how to be localized and normal,
Yesterday I received two new books,
A literate passion and on the heights of despair
I’m more caught up in those things
Then I’ll ever be, with normalcy.
I’ll say this
I want a wife and kids this decade,
I love children and I know how to love a woman
I want that,
And I’m open to it.
Sometimes a family is you, your tiny 4’10 cat wife, and cat daughter.
Dear Tumblr diary,
Today I was having vivid flashbacks, it's happening again. He's back and worse.
I’m always fascinated by the many hidden courtyards like this that can be found in Bologna.
I'm weird that way, told ya!!
Dear Cousin Who Has A Favoritism,
I really honestly don’t know why I’m writing about you. I don’t think you deserve an entry at all. But I just want to let out all I’ve felt over these past few months.
I don’t care if you don’t like me or if I don’t please you in a certain way. The hell with that. I don’t have to act a certain way so you’ll be happy and if that’s your definition of “you’re in.” I don’t have to be “in” because I am in this family and there’s no fucking thing you can do about it.
I thought about it for quite some time. The only reason why you take a liking to some people and an example of that is my sister. It’s because she’s always present and there. And want to know why? It’s because she doesn’t have a job. And I don’t blame her. It’s difficult to find a stable employment during COVID. But I really don’t want to take my likeness to someone who’s the same level with her. I know I’m just saying this now, but I’m better off doing productive things than lay on my ass and watch fucking Netflix movies all day long and have no plan for myself or my life. I’m tired of that shit. I’m never going to be in that place again.
My sister used to tell me: “Ate, anong plano mo sa buhay mo?” when I didn’t have a job. Do you know how badly I want to say that to her face and yet I don’t because I’ve been where she is? But if she doesn’t do anything about her life then that’s all on her. And if you like more people than some people, then that’s all on you too, cous. You’re not setting a good example for my sister either. So I’m happy that I am not one of your favorites because I don’t want to be a favorite to a person like you. Trust me, I don’t even want to try. 😂
Stay kupal. I hope karma bites you in the ass and brings you to fucking places.
You can suck my dick,
Don't come to me ,
Because I smell like your grandma's forgotten story.
Because I look like homeless corpse of a large city.
Because I smile like da vinci's Monalisa.