when things went wrong, I stayed. when things went wrong, you left. don’t ever question my loyalty.
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Matchstick.
I know that I lit my own matches and burned down pieces of us, too. I haven’t forgotten that. But where I was a flicker of destruction, you were an entire inferno.
S //
0It comforts me to think that we’re both looking at the same sun; at the same time despite how far apart we are.
Fern
0The problem is that when I’m lost,
I look for you.
Instead of myself.
And I always find myself wishing you’d stay a little longer.S //
1(S)he’s the reason for the teardrops on my guitar.The only thing that keeps me wishing for on a wishing star.(S)he’s the song in the car I keep singing, don’t know why I do…
Teardrops on my guitar by Taylor Swift
1She made me feel something I had never felt before but I was too scared to experience it now I am even more scared that I may never feel that way again
202/04/2020 01:57
Mi è capitato tante volte di scappare così dal buio. Mi manchi.
- mix-of-contradictions
0We may find distant or avoidant partners alluring because their avoidance is a challenge for our ego …
We might find it more exciting to be caught up in a push-pull dynamic with someone than to say yes to love that is readily available and healthy for us.
The excitement comes from eroticizing rejection - it feeds that part of us that still feels like have something to prove.
Prove we’re lovable or worthy. That we are so special that we can change someone’s mind or behaviour.
But that excitement you feel is also draining your energy and soul-sucking on so many levels.
When we abandon ourselves for someone who’s undeserving of our energy, our inner-child is is usually hurting deeply and feeling afraid to be alone.
It’s ok to walk away when your heart isn’t being cherished, honored or supported.
We’re all going to have days where we show up as the worst version of ourselves.
But at the end of the day, we all deserve to be with someone who we know is in our corner.
Someone who loves us on the hard days and treats the relationship as sacred.
Any time we waste chasing someone to give us love, there’s an unmet internal need for love and nurturance toward our inner-child.
You don’t need someone else to reflect back your wounds without being willing to heal with you.
You don’t need someone to trigger all of your insecurities by treating you like an after-thought or avoiding intimacy.
It might feel unnatural to let go of this type of connection because you’re breaking a very old pattern … you might even find it “boring” to move towards love that doesn’t trigger you.
Don’t worry, this doesn’t make you “crazy”, it means you really want to heal.
And to heal, you have to practice letting healthy love in.
Healing occurs as you sever your addictions to shadow relationships and move toward people who hold you in your highest light.
Healing comes from doing Self-acceptance work and making the relationship with YOU and your inner-child the number one relationship in your life.
And healing occurs from understanding yourself and your true nature in relationship.
- From ‘Rising Woman’
0In another life, I would be your girl, we keep all our promises, be us against the world.
- Katy perry “the one that got away”
0-doing all these at once so prepare for a long one!! obv you don’t have to read the whole thing, but please read my answer to the 3rd to last question: “do you flirt with your tc? do they flirt back?”!!
5Potential
If I told you how much I missed you
How would you respond?
A lie? To make me feel better, an empty platitude to fill the space
Until you see fit to contact me again.
Leave the message on seen
Because it’s kinder than rejecting me, again.
~
If I wasn’t confined to the house
Would these feelings have come back so hard?
Or would i be able to laugh at the fact that
You decided to say hi
And move on?
~
If the quarantine wasn’t in place
Would you have even messaged me or would I
Just be another face from the past
Liking your posts and your comments?
Popping up on your feed every so often
Just enough that you can remember what I look like.
~
If I respond
And we start talking again will you take back
What you said to me at the end?
Blame it on a fear of your parents and tell me you wish
We could restart or is that just another
Of the fantasies I thought I had let go of?
9There’s a part of me that’s certain that we will end up together. And that scares the shit out of me.
2Recently read Chain of Gold and decided to make a playlist with some songs that capture the feelings in the novel!
Give it a listen if you’re interested!
23I thought I found my soulmate. You have been getting upset with me and 9 more and more. Last night you told me “I’m thinking about leaving you” took your pillows to the living room and haven’t spoken to me since.
Working from home and trying to focus, but I feel absolutely sick to my stomach. This hurts so bad.
I know you are always going to do just what you want so there’s nothing I can do to stop you if you want to leave. I’ve learned that lesson already.
I also promised 9 that I would never bring another person into her life just for them to leave. If you really decide to go, then just know that I do truly love you, and I will not have another partner in this life.
I still think you are my soulmate. Maybe I’m just not yours.
4
Does he know my pain derives from his happiness ? Does he know that it kills me to see him so upset, knowing that I can’t bring him the happiness he needs ? This quarentine has left me numb, immobile, and absent of all desire to move forward.
I want to reach out and help, but who would use a broken crutch?
FUCK ! why do I have to love you!? Why must I feel chained to you. Why can’t I simply move on and forget you and chase what makes me feel alive, again?
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