Omg guys he’s sans
Soon the serviceberries (or one of their million other names (why does it have so many names? (my theory is that it is because if has edible fruit, that fruit has never been commericalized, had pretty flowers (but not so pretty as to be planted widely), was widespread (but not abundant)))) (clearly my parantheticals have gotten the upper hand here (ach, there I go again)) will bloom, like this Amerlanchier laevis. A solid spring bee plant, visited by many, but never taken to the prom by any one bee species. Plant it if you have a lot of shade,(or just want something lovely) pretty much anywhere that supports spring native bees. The berries taste yummy too (perhaps we need to come up with some mystical healing power developed by indigenous shaman (like the goji berry thing) to really get this plant off the ground). OK, I am going to stop the march of the parens now. Photo and specimen by Helen Lowe Metzman.
Recent Acquisition - Ephemera Collection
Your living image here you see,
A portrait true, Miss Vanity.
You are as homely as you’re vain,
A sight to give a man a pain.
Vinegar Valentine, ca. 1910s-20s
Even with yesterday’s make up I still might be a delight to wake up next to
Pairing: Vain X Lizzy X Clive
Warning: There’s spoilers for Clive’s route, mainly chapter 7 spoilers
Trigger Warning: Ex-boyfriend aggression
Summary: Meeting up with the Nidhogg to deliver the goods Lizzy made as part of her deal with the Nidhogg, what was the start of a peaceful night and slow bonding; turned to a night of shock and betrayal.
OH MY GOD IT’S HAPPENING!!!
VAIN ROUTE VAIN ROUTE
-scenes from the end of Clive’s route
摸它，it will burst.
Tomorrow came too quickly…
I believe I am once again stuck between two paths and two schools of thought. For I love people and want them to love me while at the same time loving myself and believing I need no one’s approval to do anything in my life except those I deem worthy of that power. And yet, I remain stuck with both opinions locked in my mind and fighting an endless battle.
I know I am a people pleaser. I am very empathetic, compassionate, and caring while also being self conscious, anxious, and desperate for attention. I want to be praised and accepted. I want to be loved and admired. I am vain and selfish, this I know. But I also know that you won’t get far in the world if everyone dislikes you so my practical mind refuses to discard these traits.
However, I am also committed to being independent, bold, and unique. I do what I want while keeping to my own moral code and do what I need to without fearing the opinions of anyone for doing what is right. I refuse to be a sheep to be hearded and instead boldly forge my own path. I have learned to love myself and accept that I have flaws and do not let anyone tell me that my flaws make me broken or worth less than anyone else.
And in my heart, both of these opinions and beliefs converge into a maelstrom of indecision and debate.
More or less.
Chapter 5: A lone soul.
*heading to the castle a figure in a robe. Underneath long purple hair and purple eyes. Her stare gazes into the sky with a sad look then back to the castle with a determined expression*
Sari: Vain.. wait for me.. I will free you.. I know your here. Wait for me.
*heading into the main gates of the castle she opens the doors walking inside as they shut tightly*
*a voice speaks out to her with a maniacal laugh*
???: So the main star is here.. hehehe.. come to free your love?
Sari: your hell bent on surviving Veerhah! I will make you pay for what you have done!
???: fool! to kill me is to kill your lover! do you intend to do that?
Sari: I wont kill him.. I will free him.
???: you cant.. you have it!.. kill her KILL HER!!!
*several clones of the warriors rush for her but are slashed by claws and ripped to shreds as she walks through their attacks with ease. Her powers are beyond that of all. She breaks through a hidden gate and walks up the stairway with ease. The winding path is clear and suddenly fireballs fire from all sides but she slashes them destroying them and picks up the pace. at the top of the stairs stands a beastly guardian dragon. It roars at her rushing forward to bite but she jumps losing her cloak to reval the true power she holds. Transforming her hands into claws she slashes down the dragons back as she slides down it. It roars in agony to the sky leaving itself open to her final attack. With all her might she leaps up and slashes decapitating it in one blow. It wallows and jerks around fading into light and becoming a doorway. The door to the area ahead now is open. Inside a large tree with a white skinned pale male cat like man is stiched into it. It absorbs his energy and creates fruits on its branches. She looks in horror at it walking towars him deeply saddened*
Sari: vain… my love.. Vain.. ive finally found you..hnn!?
*a swift beam of dark energy flys past her hitting her leg as she jumps avoiding it a bit. she growls and looks as the darkness continues to deteriorate her leg and make her fade. In front of her now appears a being of shadow shaped out a pool from the ground. Soon it appears with a spell circle behind it and four wings from its back it takes form into a dragonic demon like creature armored and with several horns. with only its eyes showing red in anger towards her*
???: you will not take my vessel!
*she roars out showing her fangs*
Sari: hes not your damn vessel! you damn beast! Its time I put an end to you!
*in an instant she transforms and rushes at him in her full cat form. He sends beams of darkness towards her feet as she dodges them easily and races up to him in a flash. Appearing in front she slashes across his chest causing him to roar in agony. She moves to strike again but gasps as her leg starts to fade away. now down to three she snarls*
Sari: I wont go back now I wont lose him!
*hurrying with only three legs she charges but he recovers and sends multiple beams of darkness from his own body at her rapidly hitting her everywhere. She begins to fade but with all her might she pounces and fangs bared, bites his neck pulling a chunk off and spitting it to the floor as she rolls to the ground landing in front of the tree reverting to her previous form. Veerhah gasps gagging and holding his neck as a mixture of light and dark energies spill out from his neck. Focusing on it he heals quickly as he can. Sari staggers and crawls toward the tree climbing up towards Vain and tries to embrace him as she fades more. She looks to him as he stays unconscious and his energy is drained into Veerhah. With a smile she whispers faintly talking and tears roll down her cheeks*
Sari: Vain.. ill..be back..for you.. ill never stop loving you.. hear me?.. I love you.. I love you…v..ain..
*she fades away into nothing as Veerhah recovers and snarls looking to where she was*
Veerhah: damn that beast! to be able to harm me using THAT!.. grrarauugh!…
*he smashes things around him and shifts his form into a more darker reminiscent form of Vain as he approaches him with a grin*
Veerhah: looks like her dreaming came to an end though phehahahaha. No matter how many times you come to save your precious litte king, I will be there to stop you, My castle in this world will shift and grow on him, my everlasting energy. Sari, you failed.. and you will never get him back! HAHAHAHAHA!!!
*the area turns dark and suddenly a gasp is heard. Sari opens her eyes appearing in a small room. She looks seeing the area dark. A presence moves beside her and softly places her hand on Sari’s shoulder*
???: im sorry Sari.. we were so close..
Sari: Its alright Rain.. as long as I live ill never give up.. ill keep going back. No matter what!
*Rain nodded and staggers a bit. Sari held her to stable her*
Sari: Rain!.. im sorry, I know the strain dimension shifting does to you.. im really..
*She patted Sari’s head*
Rain: dont worry about me. I will be fine after some rest. You as well though.
*Sari closed her eyes and sat down a bit feeling tired*
Sari: yes.. I know.. but ill not sleep long.. i cant stop.. these.. nightmares..
*Rain held out her arms forming grass underneath Sari as she laid down and fell asleep. She smiled looking to her a bit then frowned worried*
Rain: (I can feel how hard your trying Sari.. without Vain.. all of us will die soon.. but whats more.. the feelings you have.. they are so strong I can feel the hurting you feel without him. Mmm.. but I felt something there too.. more.. than just us.. were there.. could there be other presences in the castle?..
*she closed her eyes wondering on this as she faded into air. Around them in the quiet night, the lands floated aimlessly into the darkness*
I don’t have the exact date of this specimen, but it is likely ~100 years old and comes from the Smithsonian natural history collection. It was filthy when we got it and took a lot of processing to get it this clean. But it still has most of its color and the beautiful carpenter bee wing color (often used in diagnostics of species). Xylocopa grisescena from Brasil. Hurray for the many species of carpenter bees as they are pollinators of many flowers and visual connections to Nature for most people. Photograph by Divya Patel
“They are just jealous of me”
Even though most narcissistic people come across as confident many of them are deeply insecure.
Narcissists will criticize others in an attempt to make themselves feel better about themselves.
Their victim’s naturally react with distaste for the narcissist.
If their victims call them out on their bad behaviour instead of apologizing the narcissist instead will proclaim that their victim is “jealous of them” and that’s the only reason they are disliked.
Narcissists naively believe they are better than other people and will have no self-awareness.