tubbo hasn’t visited wilbur. not even once. he went with tommy and ranboo to see if he really got revived but after that tubbo simply stopped engaging with wilbur related activities. he could easily run over to fort big and start helping, leave a message at philzas house but he doesn’t. he stays in snowchester or watches from the outpost
it’s much easier to forgive a memory. tubbo knew wilbur, he watched him hurt in pogtopia and watched him fight in l’manburg. it’s a fuck ton easier for him to excuse his actions, pretend none of it hurt him bc he’s dead! wilbur was simply just a memory. now he’s not. if tubbo looks him in the eyes he’s scared it’s gonna be the same wilbur who made him a spy, let him die on that stage, forced him into presidency, blew up the country he worked so hard for. if he sees that man how can he forgive him?
tubbo grew up being told to forgive the people who hurt you, that it wasn’t their fault. so as soon as wilbur was dead that was what tubbo worked towards. now that he’s back the whole dilemma. he not sure if he’s going to see the man who sang songs to him around a campfire or the man who left him coughing at the smell of smoke. what makes it worse is that tubbo isn’t sure what man he wants to see. would it be easier to hate him, nail his head to the wall of people to hold a grudge against?
why can’t he be a memory, one that tubbo can hide in a mess of polaroid photos. cant he just forget the look in his eyes, the one that makes him want to forgive. the one that makes him want to hate